


In sickness and in health

by historymiss



Category: Gideon the Ninth - Tamsyn Muir
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Pining, Sex pal has no chill, partial Epistolary
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2021-02-12 18:07:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21480625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/historymiss/pseuds/historymiss
Summary: To Palamedes, the world has always been a puzzle, and he has ever refused to see any part of it unsolved.Three sets of letters from Palamedes Sextus to Dulcinea Septimus, and their replies.
Comments: 9
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

_Dear Lady Septimus,_

_Forgive me for writing to you unprompted. My name is Palamedes Sextus and I am going to be the heir of the Sixth House. I am seven years old but I am told I am smart for my age and I am studying medicine as well as necromancy._

_I am told you are very sick. _

_I am very sorry._

_Lady Septimus, I know a lot about diseases and I know more every single day. Please permit me to write to you and share my research and maybe one day we can meet up and I can try my theories and I am confident we can find a solution._

_Respectfully,_

_Palamedes Sextus  
(You can call me Palamedes if you like)_

He first hears her name when he is seven years old. It’s a discussion of the other heirs: he had just passed the first of the exams that would propel him to Warden, and he looks up from his books for the first time to see the wider universe open up above him like a vast, telescoping eye.

It dizzies him, this information. It makes him hungry for more. And so he researches, and he finds her name.

It should have been harder. It doesn’t really matter. What matters is this: that Palamedes has been raised in a library, and all his favourite stories are ones of chivalry. 

Palamedes is smart, everyone says so, and this is so beautifully simple. Here is a princess, wasting away in a tower. Here is a boy who can save her.

He finds the diseases she has, the cancer that’s eating her body and spreading through her veins, memorises the names and whispers them to himself in the silence of the library. Palamedes spits on a slide, watches the cells divide and manipulates them to his whim into simple, childish patterns. 

By the time Dulcinea’s reply has arrived, he’s made a promise to himself- he will be the heir of the Sixth, the Warden of the Library.

Palamedes will save her. No other outcome is acceptable.

_Dear Palamedes,_

_Thank you so much for your thoughtful letter. It was an unexpected but very welcome bright spot to my day._

_Congratulations on passing your exam (I think that’s how you do things in the Sixth). You do indeed sound like a very intelligent young man! I’m sure you’ve already looked up my specific ailments, and if you want to write back with any questions I’ll do my best to answer them or consult with my doctors on your behalf. _

_I can’t promise anything, but it would be very nice to have a pen pal, if you would like that._

_Yours,_

_Dulcinea_


	2. Chapter 2

_Dear Dulcinea,_

_Well, it’s official now. I gave my defence and they didn’t take long to deliver the result- I’m the Warden of the Sixth. The official heir. _

_It feels very strange to be in a position that most heirs occupy from birth. It’s a little like being late to the party- if I attended any parties, of course. I’ll probably have to now. Camilla says I should have thought about that aspect before I went for the job so hard, and as in most cases she’s probably right._

_She’s happy about being a cavalier primary, though. It’s expanded her knife budget._

_I was sorry to hear about your latest spell in isolation. It must get extremely dull in there. I can recommend a few books if you want. They’re not all scientific, I assure you. _

_Maybe one day we can discuss them in person._

_If you’re amenable to it, I mean. It’s understandable that you might not be, obviously, but I hope that you know by now that I hold you in the very highest regard, and were we to meet as heirs, maybe we could develop this friendship- and, perhaps, even turn it into something more._

_If, of course, that is what you wish._

_I’ve written too much again. My apologies. I’ll cut this short and assure you that I remain,_

_Very respectfully yours,_

_Palamedes _

Palamedes hits send before he can overthink it, his heart pounding its way out of his ribcage and an uncomfortable amount of bile rising in his throat. A decade of careful correspondence has culminated in one question he hasn’t even been brave enough to phrase directly.

“Reckless.” He mutters to himself, pushing his glasses up to his forehead to rub at his eyes. “Impulsive.”

“You called?” Camilla’s voice makes him start guiltily, hunching over his pad of flimsy like a zitty vulture. Eventually, he will grow into his ears, learn to necromantically control his acne, and bother to find robes that actually fit. For now, you could definitely use Palamedes Sextus to stop birds from eating your crops.

“No!” Palamedes snaps, then instantly regrets it. “No, Cam, I’m talking to myself. Sorry.”

She leans in the doorway, arms folded, the very picture of cavalier insouciance. Camilla has looked the same since she hit puberty, and will until her hair begins to streak silver. 

“You’re writing to her again.” It isn’t a question. Camilla watches, steadily, as Palamedes struggles through denial and defiance to arrive at their agreed centre.

“Yes.” He exhales, shuts his eyes against the Look he knows Camilla is sending his way. 

“I took an oath with my medical exams, Camilla. We both did. If I can help her-“

“I don’t want to go over it.” Camilla says shortly, her voice constricted with something that’s half anger, half resignation. “I’m sworn to protect you, Palamedes.”

“Not yet, technically.” He gives her a wry smile, which she utterly ignores.

“You know what I mean.” They’d had their own oath, down in the stacks, the day they’d both passed their first exams. Palamedes had been determined to rise- Camilla had been determined to follow him.

“How can I protect you properly when the biggest current threat to the Sixth House heir is his own unrequited feelings?”

“You’re catastrophizing.” Palamedes gives her his most infuriatingly calm look, a habit he will, thankfully, grow out of. “You don’t know it will end badly. Dulcinea and I are both adults-“

(Camilla just about hides her snort at this)

“-and I promise that if she rebuffs me, that will be the end of it.”

He looks at Camilla levelly, his eyes clear and gray and utterly devoid of any knowledge of just how cruel he’s being to her.

“Okay.” Camilla unfolds her arms and turns to go before Palamedes can see how hard she’s trying to control her expression.

“Wait, wait-“ He flaps his hand at her to stay, but she’s already halfway out of the door. “Why did you come over in the first place?”

Camilla’s reply is half swallowed in her leaving.

“Just to say congrats.”

_Dear Palamedes,_

_Though your suggestion to meet in person is well intentioned, I fear it is impossible. I can’t travel much outside of the Seventh, and any visitors I have must be strictly limited so as not to exhaust me._

_I am still so very grateful for your friendship, and very proud of all that you have achieved. _

_You understand, I hope, that I cannot give you anything more._

_Yours,_

_Dulcinea _


	3. Interlude

A few days later, Camilla is walking in the dormitories when she sees a light under Palamedes’ door. This is deeply unusual, given the hour, as Palamedes is the kind of person who has to be physically dragged away from the library’s collection and usually falls asleep at one of the research tables, glasses askew, drool puddling around his cheek.

Camilla draws her knife and shifts her weight, advancing slowly towards her necromancer’s door.

As she does, she becomes aware of a sound.

A slow, steady hiccuping, like water dripping, but irregular somehow, organic. Camilla tilts her head like an animal, tracking the scent- reaches out to push the door open a crack.

Palamedes Sextus is sitting at his desk, head in his hands, shoulders moving in the slow and steady rhythm of his sobs. In front of him is a letter bearing the distinctive crest of the Seventh House.

Camilla’s heart swells traitorously.

“Warden?” The name is a reminder, an invitation. A hand extended, carefully, for him to take.

Palamedes looks up, and Camilla can’t have been as good at hiding her expression as she thought, because she sees recognition flood his features.

She sees that it still doesn’t matter.

He looks at her, silent. She would stay if he asked. 

He never does.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Palamedes sends his last letter

Camilla hands Palamedes the letter from the Emperor over his breakfast coffee, which is a category distinct from his morning coffee and his waking-up coffee. Being Master Warden, Palamedes has often reflected, requires only a lot of caffeine and an unhealthy attraction to highlighter pens.

“It’s real paper.” Camilla notes, the first thing that either of them would notice or care about. Palamedes raises an eyebrow and stuffs the remainder of his toast into his mouth, glancing at Camilla as he does so to indicate that _look, I listened to the talk about regular meals_. 

“The preservation team are having a party. Apparently there’s a whole set of guidelines they can use for new Imperial correspondence that they never thought they’d get to crack open.”

Palamedes wipes his fingers clean with the fastidious care of someone who’s spent their whole life taking care of archive documents, takes the letter delicately between finger and thumb, and uses his nail to carefully prise the wax seal open. It only takes him a moment to read the contents, and Camilla a moment more as she’s got to peer over his shoulder.

When he’s done, he lets out a low whistle.

“It’s true, then. The losses have been unsustainable.”

“Must be bad for them to admit it.” Camilla stands back so that she isn’t so close to Palamedes, settling into something like parade rest. In front of her, her necromancer steeples his fingers.

“Records of the Lyctoral ascension have always been notoriously difficult to come by. This is an unparalleled opportunity.” 

Camilla says nothing, just watches the tension in Palamedes’ shoulders as he works towards the conclusion she’s already seen. The revelation is clear, when it comes, obvious in the slump that Palamedes corrects too fast.

The other heirs will be there. Dulcinea will be there.

Camilla, very quietly, rests a hand on his shoulder.

Palamedes touches her fingers. 

“You have a letter to write.” 

Three years ago, she would have hoped he’d forget. Now, Camilla knows that his feelings about Dulcinea Septimus are not so much an infatuation as a cage, carefully built to contain his hopes.

“Cam-“ Palamedes tilts his head back to look at her with eyes that are the colour of rain-washed glass. His voice is tense with anticipation. “We’re going to find out about Lyctorhood.”

Her grip tightens on his shoulder.

“One flesh, one end, Warden.”

_Dear Dulcinea,_

_By now you, too, will have received your Imperial Summons. You may even already be on your way to Canaan House. _

_It’s a shit deal, to give us this letter and no more information. Camilla reckons something’s up, and I think I agree. She’s packing extra knives and a box of something she calls cavalry grenades. I’m a little worried we’re not going to survive the trip if we get a rough patch._

_I suppose it’s her way of giving us insurance. This, I think, is mine:_

_This will be my last letter to you, Dulcinea. When we meet in person, it will be as friends, and I hope for nothing more. _

_Thank you for your regard, your friendship, and your time, and the very best of luck in the Lyctor trials._

_I look forward to meeting, finally, face to face._

_Yours,_

_Palamedes._


End file.
